**Close From Far, But Far From Close**
 
Did you ever think if we worked this out
Did you think how are friends would shout
Tell us we were crazy and how that night we were hazy
Do you think we did what they say
That we used each other as a sheld away
From the ones that hurt us before
Know we wont open that door
So another can come into our life
In hopes they don’t cut our heart with a nife
Do you think that our plan backfired
And the using each other grew tired
Do you think it was just a lie
The way I made you feel inside
The way you made me feel inside
Some how you grew out of reach
And now when I call you can never be reached
Did you find some were alsa to be safe
Did you find some one to restore faith
Maybe you even found a mate
Maybe they understand ya emotional state
I Thought Our Similarities made it fate
But all it did was make our divide great

By: James Benson

**To Much To Drean**                                                                           

My Breath Is Takin By Ur Beauty
Such Love Is Coming From My Heart
The Rain Is Covering My Tears
Only U Can See My Sorrow
The Past Forgotten
One I Was Loved By U
Now I Am Unloved, Unwanted
Once More My Dreams Empty Without U

By: James Benson

**Treasure and Protect**

trust worthy people make it easy to give
and killers make it hard to live
love is being crazy, so many people are sane
and alot of fake love out there, playin lame games
dont say the words if its not what u feelin
just sayin the words, to stop from dealin
with the reality that they may not be the one
just wait my brothers, real love will come
dont ever just settle nigga you a king
wait till u find love before u give honey a ring
and dont ever prejudge us ladys
take a look at these guys
give nigga a chance and u might be surprised
they could end up being ya brighten ya eyes nigga
unlike the one who leaves u with cryin eyes nigga
back to my fellas, always stay on the grind
cause that somethin ladys like when they find
always workin and never gettin set in ya ways
that way ya always work towards bettadays

By: James Benson

**Seems Like Yesterday**

As we begin to look at yesteryear
and look back at what we feared
and then look at the things that steared
-our life-
we realise we've made a big impact
end of year, with so much stacked
-but we made it out-
our future is in question but its ok
keep working hard and it will go ya way
-because ya strong-
never thought this day would come
but now u can sit back and just have fun
never got complacent, and it made us stars
maybe after graduation, our parents will buy us cars
-for the road ahead-
trade or college, maybe even work
no matter what, ya past education wont hurt
me i'm thinkin bout the service, serving my country
maybe overseas protectin people in hungry
-from all evils-
or maybe in afganistan protectiing our way of life
with my rife in my hand and my army issued rife
some of u may share my road
we may not make it back, on tv our picture showed
u may not like what we incur
-but thats just the way it is-
non of our lives will ever be the same
tupac's the one who said it wont be the same
and just now wur realizin its no game
so to all my peers who wont make it, its a shame
because next year my brotha's and sista's, it wont be the same
-thats just the way it is-

By: James Benson

**Never Mine**

how could i not see
why did it take, so much time
why didnt i see, when in my face it would shine
why am i just realizin u wur never mine
maybe cause i was blinded by my luv for u
and i just blocked out all the hurt i went thru
should have took a step back, behind the line
took a journey back in time
back when things wur goin fine
and realized then, that u wur never mine
naw u wur with me but just out of pitty
i should have known, i was just bein silly
look at me and u, its like beauty and the beast
we knew who the best was and i was the least
and now in my mind it comes together ands released
why did i talk that day, as shy as i be
i wish i listened to my fast beating hearts plea
cause den i would have never gotten in this dark whole of pain
and maybe i would be seeing sun instead of constant rain
and then just maybe i wouldn't feel this shame
i was thinking i was the shit, really got my head pumped
but since learning the truth my head has been bumped
back down to reality, dont feel so superior
i can no longer keep this face on the exteriror
as i look back at all this time.
and relize  that u wur never mine

By: James Benson

**We Didnt Talk**

even tho we didnt talk today, i've been thinking bout u
about your smile
about your kiss
about your voice
about your beautiful skin
about your name i love to say to myself
about your eyes that shake my soul
about your touch that makes me stiff
about our conversations that last for hours
about our time together that seems like forever
yes even tho we didnt talk today, i've been thinking about u
because u own my thoughts, my feelings, u own my heart
u own these things because i love u, and with that u
recieve the best of me

By: James Benson

__________________________________________

Hidden Thoughts

love i can feel at the pit of my chest

cant fight fate, i try to follow it on da low

dont want my mouth to be my akilies toe

not being able to feel u, got my body ackin

all my fuckin body and mind its takin

from not blurtin out what i'm thinkin

just keep downin the drink i've been drinkin

tellin myself i'm doin the right thing

tellin myself that u will where my ring

tellin myself u will love me like i do u

even after the stuff that we've gone thru

tell myself that absense will make u grow founder

and maybe after sometime u'll start to pounder

the idea of us is not out of the question

but for now i'm back burner my feels, no mention

me and u are bigger then a ring or a word

i look at u as my equal, not just some bird

i wish i was the voice in ya ear, so i could give some advice

hopin i could convince u, that fuckin with me would be nice

i wouldn't push u, just wish i could persuade

to give me a chance, not tryna just get laid

it might sound like i contradict myself, but u gotta read between lines

things are alot harder to understand in these times

but the easiest thing to understand bout me is loving u

because there is no one answer, baby i just do

i divolge these secrets in this poem not to be seen

hide it in my rap folders, somewhere lost inbetween

By: James Benson

__________________________________________

Bunch O Questions

do u want me long term or just for awhile

are u the type thats the F & be friends style

could u love me, or are we just waistin each others time

u and i knowin that u dont wanna be mine

could u see me in ur life, and as more then a friend

am i in ur eyes a 5 or a 10

could u walk with me hand and hand, with nothin to hide

if u saw one of ur friends, would u later have lied

and say i'm not ya man, i'm just a friend

wur not boyfriend and girlfriend, we just pretend

do u like me for who i am, or do u wanna change me

find little ways that u can rearange me

do u always tell me the truth or are ur words filled with lies

am i just now picking up and startin to relise

am i the one for u girl, this one time tell me the truth

or am i just waistin my time and over comitting

and u dont set me right, so ur permiting

is this a game u just like to play, with heads and hearts

or are u an actor, just playin parts

u know my questions i think i know the answers

looks like i'm hard of hearing to some glancers

never thought one day could change my whole view

maybe i not ment to be with u

By: James Benson

__________________________________________

How Young

i love life cause life is loving

rumors round and feelings buzzing

people get caught up in the moment

just cause they do anything to have

little boys doing little girls math

little girl doin little boys report

she lets him inside of her shirt

oh so young but they do it blindly

ones like i love u, others like thank u kindly

no balance to the feels, one up, one down

one thinks if they give it up the other will come around

but its not ment to be, virginity taken premarture

broken heart and there is no cure

same formuala repeats its self, no one learns

hearts all around the world, everyone burns

__________________________________________

Poem 1

quick to put on a ton of lip loss
this chick be at parties faster then randy moss
she a hoe, dont fuck inless ya neck shine
heard she takes money for blows over the great vine
drug dealers, executives, company VP's
these type dudes make her drop on her knees
real quick, she dont care if its a magic stick or clit
she got taken many times, taken a check for da shit
thats when she cries tears, feelin so used
its not there fault ur trust they abused
u a hoe trustin clientel aint no garantee
ya momma needs to put u over her knee
need guidence, before u get perminent VD
fuckin for cash and sharing needles can put u on an IV

__________________________________________

Priceless

white tee, blue jeans, brown tims, 200 dollas total
but my life without all that is still priceless
u see gun on my head, someone threaten to make me dead
and i wouldnt give up my 120 dollar boots
cause to me they ment more then suits
to me even if this man shoots
its only the first time shot so i'll survive
like so many others, they'll be able to revive
cause like most i think i am 100 times more tough then i be
so why should i be scared and drop to my knee
and take off my 120 dollar boots
the ones i hold higher then armony suits
because even if boots our pricessless to me doesn't mean they are to others
fathers, mothers, brothers and friends of all colors
so hand over the boots, think of what they hold priceless
cause everyone loses if u end of lifeless

__________________________________________

Friend Zone

i'm stuck in this place my friends love to hate
a position of being second rate
in her life constant but only so she can spill guys why others bad
she knows how i feel, should i be glad
that she feels she can come to me
maybe if this was the first offense
but its not so its hard to come to her defense
u say men is dogs but then u fuck dem type
say u want a good man then u duck dem type
touch and tease me but suck dem type
u say u dont wanna lose a friend
on the inside i think u just pretend
cause if dats the case, what bout the slip ups
always great but u treat like a hick up
cause there once in a great moon
next day its forgotten i'm singing a lost toon
what i can see what i can see, what i can see in u
non of these other guys deserve to be with u
u dont see there plot
i already pinpointed the spot
its like i'm waiting for ya call to give a shoulder
but its turning to fake sympathy, heart gettin colder
wanna wait for u to smart up but i'm gettin older
wastin my life on someone who is wasting there own
as i'm trapped in a scary place called the friend zone

__________________________________________

Untitled

how beautiful love could be
or so thought, but then u lock the love away
but i cant get out of it, i'm stuck in this shade of grey
everyday i'm tryna get thru one of the doors
dis area of grey has got me on all fours
preying to GODs i have never been down with in past
pretending like i found the light at last
but i havent, saw thru my fake prayers
or maybe he remembers i was one of the nasayers
so he gives me no preyers answered, go to the end of em
all the diffrent names the diffrence races have given em
nothin worked, still cant enter either entrance
its like i wrote most but cant finish the sentence
theres i and there you but i cant choice love or hate
this one dellema is delaying my fate
do i give up hope for us, focus on another girl
or stick around and try to change damage done
very hard choice and i can only choose one
heart is weighing a ton, carrying this burden
and i cant take the weight off till i choose a direction and stick
be a dick to the chick or keep the love thick, i cant pick

_______________________________________________________________

Saved Me

growth stoped by bullet thru window
tryin to fight back thru adversity
wanna make myself whole again, doctors lack hope
my girl by my side to help me cope
its hard, parents wanted to pull the plug
girl didnt allow them, deep whole she dug
because doctor bills built up, family doesn't want involvement
they say they wont be witness to my disolvement
lost memory, she helps to re-teach me
hoping that all the past will reach me
i start remembering small fragments, minutes of life coming back
few months down the line, on the recovering track
her belief doesn't wither but grow
doctors say it wont help but she give me proactive on the low
start to retrieve my past faster
doctors think they good but my girl the master
see a cousin on the street who wanted to flip the switch
one of the same who when my girl stoped them called her a bitch
they said she wanted the little money i had built
he tells everyone how good i'm doing, they feel guilt
try and drop by unannonced, show her no respect
like she is not the one to reserect
she brought be back, i give all i am to her
so i'll cut them off if she would prefer
but instead she embraces them, and doesn't hold resent
knowin i know who brought me back, with dat she content